I believe that thug life has invaded our mentality as a culture so much so that some things that would have been found to be unacceptable 30 years ago are now acceptable. Once we embrace the so-called thug life, we now accept EVERY negative thing that goes along with that mentality. If a guy is thugged out and has a quick temper, soon that same quick temper will be directed toward you as a woman. If a thugged out man is disrespectful to his mother, he WILL be disrespectful toward you as a woman. This is not hard to grasp. We must stop embracing the thug mentality and all that goes along with it. One of these things is abuse against women.
I have notice a trend with acceptance or disregard for abuse against women and I believe this is due to embracing a thug like philosophy. When I was growing up, thugs were not glamorized and decent women realized that affiliations with thugged out men were guaranteed trouble. Why have we not passed these philosophies down to our daughters? Where have we gone wrong?
I do know that I can be a bit of a feminist; I think that ALL black women should be considering that we have to deal with being both a woman and black. So we get dealt a blow on being stereotyped for being a woman and for being black. This is reason enough for every black woman in this world to be more in touch with woman’s issues in addition to black issues. One of those issues is violence against women and the thugs that commit it.
Due to the importance of this issue, I tend to post information to my social media channels that relate to these issues because I feel as if we need to be informed as women. As women being informed about violence against women can be a matter of life and death. So information is power!
I occasionally write about issues that pertain to women and most of that is specifically targeted toward BLACK women in a blog that I collaborate on. I tend to be particularly concerned with issues that pertain to Black women as I have a vested interest since I am both black and female.
Recently, I’ve notice trend of a percentage of black men that I am connected to with disturbing views on issues about women and abuse. I have been on the receiving end of quite a bit of pushback about laws put in place to protect women from abuse or in discussions about woman and abuse in general. Some have even gone so far and said that women are deserving of this kind of treatment. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? This is something that I have a hard time wrapping my mind around. How could there ever be pushback on laws that protect women? I think this is primarily because abuse against women, physical and verbal has become an accepted thing by some.
Is it that we have become, a society in which it is acceptable for black men to abuse women? What has happened to the days when men felt protective toward woman and tried to protect them? Have we as a community reached a point that we feel as if it is acceptable for the women in our community to be abused?
Could it be that now the thug mentality has totally invaded the black consciousness, which has created an acceptance of abuse? Have we surpassed common decency as a race? Has the gangster rap mentality transformed our entire culture into something that is now unrecognizable?
I think as a culture we need to regroup, and analyze what we find acceptable. When we consider what is acceptable or not, especially the abuse of women, we should think about our loved ones being the victim of abuse. When we accept and embrace violence toward women we should think about our mothers, sisters, grandmothers and daughters being abused and then form an opinion.
When I think of the disturbing conversations it makes me realize how lucky that I am to have amazing men in my life who taught me HOW to chose a man that will not abuse me and to surround myself with supportive amazing men that have respect for women.
In closing, BLACK men need to step up if they have not done so to teach their daughters by example HOW a man is to treat a woman. BLACK women must NOT expose their daughters and sons to abuse because kids do what you DO. If your son or daughter witnesses abuse, they will think its ok to accept abuse or be abusers.
The cycle of violence and acceptance of violence in our community must STOP!
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